Annalisa Turns One!

I can't believe it's been a year since I woke Seth up in the middle of the night suggesting that it might be time to go to the hospital. I had waited so long that we barely made it to the hospital in time for Annalisa was born. She popped out within just a few minutes of arriving at the hospital. No one except the midwife, nurses and myself even made it to the hospital room to witness the birth. It all happened so quickly!

                                                                   Annalisa- 2 days old

Now, Annalisa is a year old. She is a beautiful little girl with an incredibly sweet and mild demeanor. She doesn't cry or complain unless she is very tired or hungry. She adores Josh, and can't wait to see him in the morning when she wakes up. Josh is very good with Annalisa. He is a loving, kind, and thoughtful older brother.

Here they are opening Annalisa's birthday present:

So, what can Annalisa do at age 1?

- She speed-crawls and she loves playing "chase." She smiles and squeals with delight when you chase her and she tries to "run" away as fast as she can.

- She climbs up the stairs all by herself.

- She pulls herself up to a standing position and cruises along the furniture (mostly if she really wants something out of her reach). She walks with the help of the alligator clacker (baby walker) or while holding someone's hands, but she doesn't seem confident or interested in walking on her own yet.

- She says "ma ma ma ma" and "da da da da" and lots of other baby babble. She also tries to sing a lot. Most impressively, she loves to sing the alphabet song, and she actually says, "A B C D" (or sometimes she mixes up the letters).

- She LOVES music! As soon a song starts to play, she makes a clicking sound with her tongue (to the beat of the music) and then starts to sway back and forth.

- She uses some baby sign language: milk, all done, more, eat, drink....

- She plays peekaboo, claps her hands and waves bye bye.

- She has 4 teeth (two upper and two lower) and she eats lots of finger foods: fish, eggs, ham, bread, pancakes, fruit, veggies, and more. She likes to feed herself (even with a spoon), but meal time is a VERY messy affair!

- She knows exactly how to open the baby gate (which button to push), but, fortunately, she can't open it yet. Here are some pictures to show you what I mean:

                                                   Ah ha! I can stand up to reach the gate!

                                                 Hmm... I wonder what this button does...?

                                                  Oh! This must be how I open it!

                                                     Look at me! I can (almost) escape...:)

Annalisa is curious about the world around her, and she loves to touch and explore everything.

Josh's new obsession- SPIDERMAN

What is it about boys and superheroes?

Josh has never seen a single Spiderman episode, and yet he is obsessed with Spiderman.

(Of course, his obsessions seem to change on an almost weekly basis: first it was Super Why! Then it was Buzz Lightyear. The superhero-obsession, however, seems to have lasted longer than the others.)

Josh even begged me to learn the Spiderman theme song so that I could teach it to him. So, I went on YouTube and we watched the introduction to the 1967 Cartoon; then, we downloaded the lyrics and learned the song. Yep! I can sing you every word in that 3-verse song.

So, lately that is our play time- we make believe that I'm the "bad guy" and Josh is Spiderman (or occasionally, he's Batman or Superman). He either spins his web to capture me, or, more often than not, he "pows" me, and I fall on the ground and we re-enact this scene over and over again....!

(Can you see why I love having outings or play dates with other kids?) :)

Dress-Up Fun

Josh is at the stage where he LOVES to dress up and play make-believe. He would do this fantasy play all day long if he could. The first words out of his mouth the moment he wakes us up (at 5:30!)  in the morning are, "May I please wear my Buzz Lightyear costume?" Then, we proceed to act out Toy Story 1, 2, and 3 over and over again. (We've recently borrowed all three movies, all of which are great movies- fun for both kids and adults!)

For Halloween, Josh actually wore TWO costumes. During the day, at preschool, he dressed up as his beloved Buzz Lightyear:

In the evening, Josh went trick-or-treating with his friend, Sean. He wore his "Super Why!" costume (based on an educational PBS cartoon that teaches kids how to read). This costume was half-borrowed and half-assembled by Grandma Terry:

                                                                            

 Prior to Halloween, I saw an adorable firefighter costume at Costco, but when I brought it home, Josh refused to put it on because it didn't "fit right." (He went through a clothing-refusal stage for a few months where he refused to wear nearly any outfit he owned. It drove me bananas, and thankfully, it appears to have mostly subsided....) One day, out of the blue, he said, "I want to wear my fire fighter costume. Hallelujah!
Here's the result:
(Do you recognize the boots, Grandma Kiki?)

Now, Josh has developed a superhero obsession; first it was with Batman and most recently it is with Spiderman (and, no, he has not seen any of the cartoons). Here he is playing dress-up with his friends from my MOPS group:

Even Annalisa got in on the dress-up action for Halloween. Here she is, dressed as little ladybug:

Isn't dressing up so much fun??

A Way to Make Breakfast More Fun and Interesting

When you have a three year old, it helps to try to make food fun. Breakfast isn't usually a problem with Josh, but he tends to always request "granola."

This morning, I decided to make pumpkin pancakes with pumpkin butter (from Trader Joe's), scrambled eggs, fruit, and a sprinkle of granola. The picture above was Josh's breakfast (which he ate in record time!), and the picture below was my plate.

See how much more fun that is than a plain old bowl of granola...!

Keep Your Eyes Lifted Up

For the past several weeks, I have found myself mired in the slimy pit of depression and hopelessness. I have not had the emotional energy to write a blog entry. Nor did I want to depress my (few) blog readers. Moreover, when I experience these negative emotions, I have a tendency to ruminate and obsess- and then to spiral downward.

I don't know how many of you believe in spiritual attack, but Seth and I found ourselves absolutely bombarded with struggles just after Seth decided to contribute 10% of his business proceeds to Charity Water in order to build a freshwater well in Rwanda. Coincidence? Call it one if you like. But, we don't think so. Satan loves to destroy a good thing.

After a record month (in August), business came to a screeching halt. The phone lines were quiet. Some clients were difficult. Repairs were needed on the van. Gas prices rose. Bills bills bills. And not enough money to pay them.

Admittedly, I have always struggled to embrace this cleaning business. It has never provided enough money. There are no health benefits. There's no retirement fund. No paid vacation days. No sick days. No stability. I confess that I have been far too critical and not nearly as supportive or helpful as I should be. I think my criticism comes out of a place of fear, frustration, and helplessness. I can't offer much (financial) assistance right now since jobs in my professional field have dried up. What I earn from some entry level job will not begin to cover childcare costs (not to mention the mental, physical and emotional it would take on me to try to balance full-time work with being a full-time mom).

In addition to our financial challenges, we have had other struggles as well. No one is getting enough sleep or rest in our home. (I, for one, haven't had a decent night's sleep in over a year!) We have all been cranky and on edge. The kids have been incredibly challenging: Annalisa because of her sleep issues, and Josh...well...because he's three. Seth and I do not ever have date nights. Romance, fun and laughter went out out the door long ago. Seth and I are both lousy and self-care (with the exception of working out regularly). I could go on and on...but, you get the picture.

So, with the weight of the world upon my shoulders, I found myself looking down. Down into my slimy pit....then climbing inside. Rather than looking up to the Lord for help and lifting my arms so that He could pull me out of the abyss.

After about three or four weeks of feeling miserable and wanting nothing more than to run away, I decided to start looking up and also reaching out for help and support.

Our small group is studying the Psalms right now, and our study is based on the pastor's sermon series. I love the Psalms. They are so real. So accessible. King David had some pretty major struggles. His sins were egregious. He literally had to fear for his life. But, he also emanated joy and his praise was sincere. He trusted that God would lift him out of the pit and restore his hope.

The following (Psalm 121) is one of my favorite psalms (though there are so many good ones!). It reminds me to keep my eyes lifted up and to have faith in God. He is faithful and cares about us. My trials are temporary but my hope is eternal. This is how it goes:

"I lift my eyes to the hills-
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot slip-
He who watches over you will not slumber;
indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord watches over you-
the Lord is your shade at your right hand;
the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep you from harm- he will watch over your life;
the Lord will watch over your coming and going
both now and forever more."

Even though we are still dealing with some of these challenges and we are not yet out of the woods, my perspective has changed. I have become more hopeful, more proactive, and more centered on God. I am not mired in despair as I was a few weeks ago.

I wanted to share this experience in order to be an encouragement to you.  If you're ever feeling or lost or hopeless, keep your eyes lifted up. God loves you and cares about you. He wants to restore your hope and your joy. I think that sometimes, when we're in the thick of it, we need to remind each other of this truth.

And She's Off.....

Finally, at 8.5 months, while vacationing at Pismo Beach, Annalisa started crawling. She's been getting into crawl position and rocking on all fours for quite some time, but had never crawled more than a few steps until now.

Still, Annalisa seems more content sitting in one place or flopping onto her belly. She has to really want something to get motivated enough to crawl to it. (I guess that works in my favor for now, as I can put off "imprisoning" her in a baby gate for a little longer....)

Here's a picture of Annalisa when she started crawling around the hotel room at Pismo Beach.

Pismo Beach: Our family's first work-vacation

Over Labor Day weekend, our family drove up the coast for three hours to a lovely tourist spot called Pismo Beach. This was our family's first "work-vacation" (or shall I call it "workation?"). Seth was hired to clean Hunter Douglas window treatments at a home near Pismo Beach, so we decided to make a family vacation out of it. We wouldn't save much money from the job, but we'd pay for the whole weekend and be able to splurge a bit.

We left early Friday morning, and my hope was that both kids would sleep in the car. But, alas, we had no such luck. We stopped briefly in Montecito for a coffee, a muffin, and a potty break, and then resumed our drive. Both kids were pretty tired and cranky by the time we arrived at the hotel.

We had splurged on a suite at the Hilton Gardens so that we could close off one room with the kids in it when the went to sleep at 7:00 p.m. This proved to be a very prudent decision. While Seth was working, Annalisa took a nap and Josh and I played games. Four hours later, Seth returned, and we went for a delicious swim in the hotel pool. The rest of the evening was low-key: Seth and Josh went grocery shopping and brought back Thai food for dinner, and then the kids went to bed and we retired to our room to watch TV.

On Saturday morning, the kids woke up bright and early, and we headed to Pismo Pier for breakfast. After feasting on eggs, potatoes, bacon and pancakes, we went for a walk on the pier. The minute he placed a foot on the pier, however, Josh took off in a full-blown sprint. He ran...and ran...and ran...and didn't stop until he got to the end. Josh marveled at the fishermen and pelicans. Annalisa marveled at everything and everyone. After a brief walk around the beach, it was time to return to the hotel for Annalisa's morning nap.

To be honest, we spent much of our three-day trip in the hotel room. When traveling with two young children, it's difficult to stay out and about for very long. Nevertheless, Seth and I enjoyed indulging in crab legs and bottle of white wine. We also loved swimming in the warm pool and relaxing in the hot tup, strolling around downtown San Luis Obispo, visiting Avila Beach, and just being OUT of hot, busy L.A. for weekend. 

It was also our trial run at a "work-ation," and I gotta say, I kinda like 'em. 

Josh's First Day of Preschool

The day did not go as planned. Then again, does it ever?

In my fantasy version of the day, Josh woke up excited and eager to attend his first day of preschool. He cooperated while I dressed him up in smart-looking shorts and a coordinated shirt. I combed his hair, brushed his teeth, and snapped a First Day Photo of my handsome little preschooler with his Thomas the Train backpack.

Here's the picture I had planned to take:

In reality, the morning went much differently than I had imagined. Josh woke up cranky and uncooperative. Everything was a battle. He screamed and cried when I put on his navy blue Polo Ralph Lauren shorts (because they were too roomy in the waist), so had to settle for navy play shorts (with an elastic waist band) and a Hawaiian shirt. He resolutely refused to put on his new tennis shoes, so I ended up having to put them in his backpack and taking him to his classroom barefoot! And, the first day photo…never happened. Josh arrived at his preschool class barefoot, tear-stained, and grumpy. 

When we arrived promptly at 9:00am, I explained the “no shoes” incident to his teachers, who told me not to worry. “We’ve seen everything,” they calmly stated. “We’ll talk about the importance of keeping our feet safe at school.” Oh well, it could have been worse. The mom next to me had to pry her screaming, clingy son off of her and make a mad dash out the door. Josh, by contrast, happily sat (shoeless) in the circle with his peers.

The first day was a short day- only two and a half hours- barely enough time to get home and back. When I arrived, I saw a little boy who looked like Josh playing with a little girl. But, he wasn’t dressed in the clothes I dressed him in or his extra clothes. At closer look, I realized that it was, indeed, Josh, so I figured he must have had a potty accident and the teachers had put him in the wrong clothes.

When I inquired about the mystery clothes, his teachers told me that Josh had had not one, but TWO potty accidents, so they had put him in school clothes. I was mortified. The teachers, however, were very nonchalant about it. Not to worry, they assured me. He’ll learn.

Well, we have a fresh start next week, so, fingers crossed, it’ll go much more smoothly.

 (Josh's actual First Day of Preschool photos)

Regrets

I don't believe in regrets. After all, there is nothing we can do to change the past. All we can do is learn from the past and use it to change our present and our guide our future.

If I did believe in regrets, I could give you a whole list of them, such as:

I regret not taking more family photos, especially some with ME in them.
I regret not having had professional photos taken (then again, we couldn't have afforded these).
I regret not writing down my children's milestones right when they happened (because I forget the specifics now).
I regret not hugging, kissing, and appreciating my children more when they were teeny tiny babies because they are growing up so quickly (but sometimes I find myself  wishing they were older so I could finally get a decent night sleep!)
I regret not starting a blog sooner...
...and the list goes on.

And, if I'm not careful and start to go down this path of regrets, I could easily start regretting my career choice, my decision to travel around the world, my overseas teaching experience...and a whole host of other dangerous and useless regrets. Because all of these decisions (which were actually the RIGHT  decisions) came with costs and trade-offs (as all big decisions do). 

We all make decisions based on the best information (and limitations of time, money, and resources) that we have at the time. We don't know what the future holds, so we have to go with our gut and hope for the best. We make our decision and we don't look back.

And, about those things we didn't do that we "should have" done...? Well, obviously, we can't change our lack of action. Rather, we forge ahead and make goals and action plans for the present and future.

So, I won't dwell on regrets. Rather, I will create "I will" statements for the future:

I will start taking more family photos.
I will find a way to occasionally pay for professional photos.
I will appreciate my children each day and tell them I love them.
And as for the blog....

Well, here it is. My imperfect, ever-evolving, three years overdue blog. Better late than never.